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I could smell the ice, it smelt like freezing water. The dust climbed up my nose making me sneeze every second. There was a smell that smelt like freezing air. The rocks smelt like very fresh puke. It was really gross.
The snowflakes glistened gently gliding onto my hand, it felt like I had icicles on my palm. The thick snow was covering my feet and it made my boots turn to ice. I tripped and all the snow jumped over me. I felt the hail fall on me, I could hear the hailstones touch the ground.
I could hear the wind blowing on the mountain. The rocks rolling everywhere were making a big noise. I heard the clouds making lightning that sounded like a big lion roaring really loudly. The clouds bashing and crashing into each other sounded like a massive giant stomping angrily.
I felt cold and wet. The snow that was already up to my knees made me feel mad. I was coughing and sneezing every second, and my throat felt really sore. I felt like there was a frog in my throat. The hail dropping on my body felt like huge rocks falling on me.
By Bar
Hi Bar
ReplyDeleteI really like your alliteration E.G glistened gently gliding.- I also liked that you used all of your senses so that I felt as if I were really in that place.
I did notice that four of your five paragraphs started with the word "I"so next time maybe vary the sentence beginnings.
from Mia.