Monday 23 June 2014

On Top Of A Mountain


I could see the snow falling on top of the mountain. The ground was all white… The rocky walls looked like there were about to fall down any minute.  The snow was running everywhere, going crazy.

I could smell the ice, it smelt like freezing water. The dust climbed up my nose making me sneeze every second. There was a smell that smelt like freezing air. The rocks smelt like very fresh puke. It was really gross.
The snowflakes glistened gently gliding onto my hand, it felt like I had icicles on my palm. The thick snow was covering my feet and it made my boots turn to ice.  I tripped and all the snow jumped over me. I felt the hail fall on me, I could hear the hailstones touch the ground.

I  could hear the wind blowing on the mountain. The rocks rolling everywhere were making a big noise. I heard the clouds making lightning that sounded like a big lion roaring really loudly. The clouds bashing and crashing into each other sounded like a massive giant stomping angrily.

I felt cold and wet. The snow that was already up to my knees made me feel mad. I was coughing and sneezing every second, and my throat felt really sore. I felt like there was a frog in my throat.  The hail dropping on my body felt like huge rocks falling on me.

By Bar



1 comment:

  1. Hi Bar

    I really like your alliteration E.G glistened gently gliding.- I also liked that you used all of your senses so that I felt as if I were really in that place.

    I did notice that four of your five paragraphs started with the word "I"so next time maybe vary the sentence beginnings.

    from Mia.

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